Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Tax... Tax...

1) Qus.: What are you doing?
Ans.: Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX

2) Qus.: What are you doing in Business?
Ans.: Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX

3) Qus.: From where are you getting Goods?
Ans.: From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI

4) Qus.: What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans.: Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX

5) Qus.: How do you distribute profit ?
Ans : By way of dividend
Tax : PAY DIVIDEND DISTRIBUTION TAX

6) Qus.: Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans.: Factory.
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY

8) Qus.: Do you have Staff?
Ans.: Yes
Tax: PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX

9) Qus.: Doing business in Millions?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX ?
Ans : No
Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax

10) Qus.: Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans.: Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX

11) Qus.: Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans.: Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX

12) Qus.: Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX

13) Qus.: Have you taken or given any Service/s?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX

14) Qus.: How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans.: Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX

15) Qus.: Do you have any Wealth?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX

16) Qus.: To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans.: Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX

17) Qus.: Have you purchased House?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE

18) Qus.: How you Travel?
Ans.: Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE

19) Qus.: Any Additional Tax?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL &
SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!

20) Qus.: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans.: Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY

21) INDIAN : Can I die now??
Ans : Pls die in the next 3 mnonths... or else., you will have to pay the the FUNERAL TAX effectove October !!!

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